A Lone Girl Blogs…

It feels like that’s what I should rename my blog.  I feel like I have changed a lot.  I have tried to do things differently.  I am no longer completely stuck in one spot and too lazy/unmotivated to do anything about it.  I am now actively trying to figure out how to get to where I want to go, which makes me feel like I am no longer that lazy bored girl that would write depressing posts for no one to read.

However, I won’t rename my blog.

I will however tell you that the reason I feel like I should rename my blog “A Lone Girl Blogs” is because of my birthday coming up in less than 2 months.

If you follow me on twitter or tumblr, you will know that I will be turning 25 next year and that I want to go away for my birthday.  When I am 25, I want to either go to Disney World or Vegas.  I don’t know why those two places in particular, well Disney World because I feel like 25 = grown up and all I want is to have a break from adulthood and be a kid again.  Also, if you follow me, you will know that I want to CHOOSE to be alone on my birthday.

You see, I have always had a feeling that I will be alone for my entire life.  I feel like next year I should learn to embrace it.  I have already learned to smile for myself and not others but I think it’s time for me to just accept that I will be alone.  I have tried and it’s gotten to a point where I don’t think my heart can take it anymore.  I never thought I had trust issues and always assumed it was commitment issues but it’s a little bit of both.  I don’t trust that anyone will ever be there for me, I feel like everyone I love will always leave me and that’s why I have always left before they could leave me.  This is why, next year I will learn to accept the fact that I am alone and I will be ok.

I feel like next year is going to be an important year for me.

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2 thoughts on “A Lone Girl Blogs…

  1. Pingback: “If life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” | a little bit of everything

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